Camille James says ~

It's me Camille. I have been a loyal fan of yours for over 10 years and this is my Dear John letter to you. Yea, I know I've said it a million times that I was leaving you and 24 hours I was back, but this time I'm older. This relation-ship has sunk and I'm jumping ship. You are a hell of a drug. The kind that will make you:

• Get out of bed at 3 am in some bunny rabbit house shoes and a robe just to go to the nearest corner store.

•  Add you to my weekly budget - sometimes before the eggs and milk.

• Know that you contain rat poison, tar, a little bit of tobacco and probably swine flu and I still want you.

• Spray perfume on and think no will smell the smoke in my hair.
  

• Get up in the morning looking for you and go to sleep thinking about you.

• Go out in 40 below zero weather, with freezing rain trying to take a drag in between my nose falling off.

• Ride around for hours trying to find my brand only to settle for the 2 for 1 special.

• Read the warning label on the side for entertainment while I'm taking a puff.

• Deny our relation-ship to my husband, kids and my mother with cigarette breathe.

• Walk up to a complete stranger and ask for a lighter no matter how suspect they might look.

• Do everything from gum, patches, Zyban and even hypnosis only to want to put a whole pack in my mouth and light the end.
  

I have been designing websites for over 13 years now and have been blessed to always have a flow of clients no matter where in the world I have traveled or lived. When I first started I knew that I would have to give away my gift in order to build my portfolio and sharpen my skills as an artist. At some point in my career and after buying into so many other people's dreams, I decided I was done paying dues. There was nothing left to prove. They would either see my work and trust that I would do a great job or go to someone else. Either way I would have my time or my money and that's considered a win-win in my book.

I'm always approached by others who want my gift as a web designer for FREE in exchange for a promise. The illusive opportunity that by me giving them a website for FREE would maybe one day turn into something profitable in the distant unknown future. What I found out was that if you give someone something for free they will not appreciate it or find value in the offering. If by chance they did refer you to someone else, that person would also want something for FREE. This is the infamous Hook Up. OMG... Give me a break people. I have to feed my kids too. The phone company won't except a hook up, but rather I would get a hang up or a cut off.

My Aunt Mae (bless her soul) would always say, "if you give a man your cookies for free, he will tell everyone about it and want to share it with his boys. If he has to spend time and money trying to court you, he will cherish your relationship and will want to keep you all to himself." She was so right. It doesn't have to always be money, because TIME and ENERGY is more valuable than that.

It's so easy to give away your gift because it comes to you from within and there is no limit to its supply, but there's a reason for having this gift. God grants these abilities to us when we are in the womb to ensure that we will be able to take care of ourselves and our families throughout our lifetime. Your gift is meant to substin you. In every group there is something unique that each person possesses that is meant to benefit the whole. It is not an exchange when you are giving away your gift for FREE in hopes that you will receive something later.

The next time someone asks for your gift for FREE, ask them to exchange something of value that YOU can use right then... not later. Make sure it's something of equal value and not a company pen, t-shirt or a bridge. People who want something for free are manipulators who prey on others with a good heart. Don't be fooled... they will come to you as family, freinds, co-workers or business prospects. I know it's hard to put a price tag on your gift, but think about how much money per hour you would like to make and then think of how much time it takes you to produce your gift and there you have it....

I remember getting to the editing part and at the time my finances were suspect. So I told the angels that if you want this book published - help make a way. They did and I got so caught up in the new money that I forgot about my Promise. So things got real shaky on the job and it brought me back down to my knees. The angel, Gabriel said - well we found a way and you got lost again. The money that you earned from your job was not for a new bedroom set or an outfit, but for humanity's spirituality. Your purpose is not your job. It is only a means to a greater purpose. The one we have for you. Teach the world how to sing the songs of the Uni-Verse.

The next day I hired my editor.

I decided to bring the New Year in with a traditional full body detox. Previously I had undergone fertility treatments that eventually had long term affects. I was taking pills, injections, Zyban to quit smoking and living with the news that my husband would soon deploy to Iraq. So shortly after the treatments were over with no success, I slowly began to see the side effects.

One morning I was looking at myself in the mirror and I realized that I had an ass in the front and one in the back. I wasn't sure which way to put my pants on. My arms had grown to the point that I could no longer read the words on my tattoo. I was hot and then cold. It got so bad that I couldn't sit through a full game of monopoly without flipping the table over cause I owed $15 for landing on Park Ave. I had gain 30 lbs just that quick. So enough is enough..... I'm ready Lord.

As the spirit must have heard my call, I got a referral for a new website client, who just happened to be a holistic practitioner. She agree to work with me and help me through a total body detox. After explaining various methods, I selected a 7 day olive oil flush. I only picked that one because it was only 7 days and I could at least eat raw vegetables and fruits. The others required zero food. So I thought to myself how hard could it be? I've been beating up my body for so long that 7 days should go by quick. My mistake... it was actually 8 weeks. OK... that's a later story.

So my supplements come in and I begin preparing myself for 5 days by increasing my water intake and slowly excluding meat from my diet. January 1st finally arrives and now it's time to take the 16 oz of cold pressed olive oil. The instructions say drink it with lemon juice to keep it down and finish within 2 hours. I take the first gulp.....

Until next time

Weight: 170 lbs | PH: 6.5

A dear friend once said that the key to his success was having no expectations, therefore he never experienced disappointment. I had to ponder on that for a while and eventually I understood. It especially rang true to people I encounter, because every time I placed my own expectations on another... they always fell short.

I think that's why a lot of women are single today. Ladies you know how we come up with this extravagant list of qualities that we want in a man. He has to be rich, funny, strong, sensitive, honorable, loving, wise and no baby mama drama... and the list goes on and on.So much so that many women are actually looking for someone who does not actually exist. Well maybe in the comic books.

So I set out into the world with no expectations, which actually opened my world up to possibilities I did not know existed. This allowed the people I met and myself the freedom to just be...... How simple is that?

When two come together, they form a relation. 
A ship is designed to take you on a journey.

What is 11:11

Your point of power begins from within.

It takes a great amount of courage to accept responsibility for the situations in your life. This may seem difficult when you were not the only one involved in the situation, such as being slandered or taken advantage of by another. Long after the situation has passed, the memories of the events seem to replay themselves until it takes a life of its own. You might ask, “Why should I accept all the blame? I was the innocent one”. Yet you are the one left defenseless and in a weakened state. It is very easy to blame others or outside forces for certain dilemmas and by doing so, you are thereby powerless over the outcome. The weakened state is caused by an involuntary release of power.

 

In the act of accepting responsibility, you are thereby becoming empowered. By realizing that you created the situation, you are now able to re-create it. As long as someone else is being blamed for the problem, they are the only ones who can transform it. When you are not being the co-creator that you were designed to be, someone else will gladly do the creating for you. This will lead to you becoming part of someone else’s agenda and not that of your own. You’ll wake up one day and say, “how did I get into this situation?” This is simply because you stop creating or were not aware that you had the power to create in the first place.

As most of you know I have developed a close and intimate relationship with the angels. This started when I was about 28 years old and I had not learned how to distinguish between the voice of my ego and my higher self. I was told spiritually that it was time for me to leave the comforts of my home, but I was still in the infancy of my spirituality and I quickly dismissed the warning as a figment of my imagination. So I stayed and held tightly to what I knew was safe. Shortly after I began to cough. At first, I figured this was just some kind of virus going around. Then the cough got worst and I began to have episodes where I could not breathe.

I immediately did what anyone else would do and go see the doctor. They quickly whipped out the prescription pad after speaking with me an astonishing 30 seconds and wrote me a prescription for a codeine cough syrup. I did not realize this was the same syrup that all the rappers so eloquently speak of in their lyrics. Shortly after taking the prescription, I completely understood the philosophy behind the addiction. I felt like the bionic man and everything started to play out in slow .... motion. I sat there on the bed for a while and eventually I ended up in the hallway with nothing on but a belt and some socks on.

Weeks later, the cough still did not go away and the doctors began prescribing me inhalers and steroids to treat my violent asthma-like attacks. Finally the doctors gave up and could not figure out what I had come down with. It never crossed my mind that anything that can not be explained by man is spiritually related. I had lost so much weight and could not keep my job. I was still designing websites, but I barely could sit up in the chair for long periods of time. A month had passed and my attacks were a common occurrence. Nothing worked to treat my symptoms and I was increasingly coming weaker and weaker.

That's it... I can't take it any longer. I called my soul friend to come pick up my two girls, because honestly I was ready to cross over where there would be no more pain. She quickly came to get the girls and I laid down in the bed and read the 91st chapter of Pslams. "For He shall give His angels charge over thee to keep thee in all thy ways". Then the cough came worst than I had ever experienced and I crawled to the bathroom floor in an effort to reach the toilet seat. My hands slipped and my face hit the cold tile on the floor. I could not move and then I began to feel a warm sensation running down my legs. I knew this was it and this was how I was going to die.

The only thing I could control was my eyes and I slowly opened them to see my English Bulldog, Rocco sitting in front of me with his nuts in my face. There was nothing I could do, but lie there helpless. Things began to get blurry and I closed my eyes with hopes that this would all end soon.

Camille ..... Camille, can you hear me? Open your eyes my child, said this soft still voice. I opened my eyes expecting to see Rocco, but as my vision cleared there in front of me was the most powerful blue eyes I had ever encountered. Work with me as I try to explain something that can not be explained. His skin was not Caucasian white, but snow white with sparkles of translucent shimmers like the stars in the night sky. His hair was white and course like the hair on a horse or lion. His face was down on the ground with mines, which made us see eye to eye.